Being a mom is a whole new experience within itself. Learning how to care for a newborn, changing diapers, breast and bottle feeding… literally figuring out how to manage every day without having a mental breakdown! Don’t even get me started on friends!
A lot of my friends don’t have kids yet. I felt like I was going through pregnancy without being able to have someone to relate to. Like if my tits were leaking milk, my friends wouldn’t understand. If you’re constantly peeing yourself, they wouldn’t know how to relate. And that’s okay.
I am a firm believer of having friends from all phases and parts of my life. I have my high school friends, my college friends, my work friends, my family friends, and now… my mom friends! Of course, some of them overlap. 🙂 But, how do you make mom friends? Let me give you some pointers and tips on getting yourself out there!
Be Very Proactive!
Even before I gave birth to my kids, I was actively joining local Facebook groups for new moms, and for moms who had kids already. It was a nice way of connecting with the community and asking other moms for advice. Trust me… there are a lot of moms who are in the same boat as you! A lot of moms are super receptive and would love to make new friends too, so that their kids can have future play dates! You’re definitely not alone. I’ve met a few moms from the groups and we have a few play dates planned in the future.
I’ve met this wonderful mom who actually passed down some of her daughter’s clothes to my daughter. She’s also helped me a lot when there were formula shortages, and we’ve just honestly connected on such a deeper level. You’d be surprised how many amazing women are out there and how many life long friendships you could make. 🙂
Even if it’s being proactive online, that’s always a good first step. You should be proactive outside too! If you’re at the park, just strike up friendly conversations with other moms. They’ll most likely have lots to say too! Ask about their kids age, if they have siblings, etc. I’ve met a few wonderful moms at the local park I go to. Although it’s been a little colder lately, I definitely will be hitting up the park when it gets warmer with the kids and making some convos with other local moms! And sometimes, your kids might socialize themselves!
I know a lot of new parents go to mommy and me classes and local libraries have a lot of programs! There are baby library groups that you can go to, and there are baby sections where your little one can explore with books. Of course, the kids will be accompanied by their parents. So, why not take part of the local groups? You never know. You’ll might see the same faces every week and maybe that’ll spark a new friendship.
Connect With Old Friends or Friends of Friends
I’ve recently reconnected with my good friend’s sister! She has a daughter similar in age to Mason, and I reached out hoping for a playdate. And guess what… the playdate was a success! It looks like Mason has a new girly friend 😉 (jkjk) but, it was nice to reconnect with her and have our kids play. With covid, my kids weren’t able to go out and do much because everything was closed. So, they never were able to go and socialize and make friends themselves. We now are planning some future playdates when it gets warmer.
There are a lot of sporting events that are specifically for moms. Like the Phillies Mother and Son night. We took Mason to the Phillies game before and you’d be surprised with how many parents bring their little ones. This definitely is another place to connect with other moms about being a mom and about sports… DUHH! If you find conversation hard to start, just mention the sporting event. Easy way to ease into conversation. Maybe in the future, you can bring your kids with their kids and you can all have a blast.
When the weather gets cold, you should check out indoor playgrounds. There are a lot of moms who go there to get their kids energy out. Not only does your kids get to explore and play, but you get to hang out with other moms there. It’s definitely a good way for the kids to exert all their energy while you sit back and gossip with the other moms! LOL
Indoor playgrounds are a more controlled way of having your kids play. You don’t have to worry about them running away to the streets and you don’t have to worry about them getting lost. So, let loose a little mama, and sit back and chat with some other moms. Your kids can’t be the only ones having all the fun.
Take Your Kids Everywhere
A lot of moms will comment about your kids! Asking about their age, and how cute they are. From our Costco runs to our Dave and Buster runs, we’ve met lots of moms and conversed with them. Whether it’s asking about their age or how cute they are, to talking about how they can relate to a lot of things. I think bringing your kids with you to places from a young age help desensitize them from being in big crowds and loud noises. My son doesn’t get phased in public as much anymore, and he isn’t too intimidated about being out and about.
Honestly, being a parent is hard in itself, but I believe you need to take the time to put yourself out there so that you don’t feel alone. I think making mom friends is honestly similar to dating. You have to put yourself out there, schedule dates, give your phone number, etc. There will be a handful of bad “dates” and a lot of good ones. But, some of these friendships will be forever friendships. I guarantee that!